People Who Grew Up Feeling Extremely Close To Their Parents Usually Carry 11 Habits Into Adulthood
PeopleImages | ShutterstockWhile close parent-child relationships can bring a ton of benefits over the course of their lives, from empathy through affection and accountability in trust, a study from Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Mental Health argues that they’re largely a buffer. When stress and emotional turmoil erupt in an adult child’s life, the bonds of childhood and present family relationships provide a barrier to the symptoms.
People who grew up feeling extremely close and bonded to their parents usually carry certain habits into adulthood, like cultivating high standards and appreciating alone time, which they adopted in their loving homes. They were offered space to grow, develop, cultivate emotional intelligence, and find their identities because their parents led with empathy, intention, and love.
People who grew up feeling extremely close to their parents usually carry 11 habits into adulthood
1. They call and text their parents often
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While disconnection and distance between parents and adult children are somewhat natural after they start their own lives and move out of the house, people with incredibly close bonds still make time to connect, even if it’s only over the phone.
They still love, trust, and seek support from their parents regularly, because they’ve crafted a lifelong feeling of “home,” even when they’re not under the same roof.
2. They comfortably appreciate solitude
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Offering kids alone time often boosts their self-reliance, confidence, and emotional intelligence, even if it’s not always easy or comfortable for them to dive into right away. The difference between a child who spent all their time alone and had parents shape pockets of solitude intentionally is their mindset in adulthood.
Kids who had incredibly close relationships with their parents, while still having space for alone time and personal hobbies, have a more positive mindset toward solitude as adults. Luckily, as a study from Cognitive Therapy and Research explains, it’s this mindset that offers them far more benefits to spending time alone than the average person who’s consistently avoidant of it.
3. They handle conflicts with grace
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Secure adult children with the ability to resolve conflicts healthily didn’t grow up in a home with no arguments. They simply watched their parents model proactive behaviors and loving resolutions. The key to teaching kids how to resolve conflict isn’t to avoid them completely, but to show them what loving, empathetic repair looks like, even if it’s sometimes uncomfortable.
In their relationships as adults, they know how to express themselves, bring up issues, and resolve conflicts without immediately resorting to defensiveness or avoidance. They watched their parents model healthy behavior to learn, and in many ways their parents' intentionality bonded them closer together with every argument and misunderstanding.
4. They continue family traditions
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While family traditions and gatherings can often feel like a draining obligation for people with toxic family dynamics and relationships with their parents, adult children who grew up with constant love and support appreciate continuing them into adulthood. They’re not emotionally complicated or rooted in stress, but a true pillar of happiness and love.
In fact, the same traditions and gatherings that bonded them with their parents as kids create a sense of meaning in their adult lives, whether they’re still spending it together or passing the love down to their own kids and partners.
5. They learn from mistakes
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When a child has space to feel nurtured by their parental figures in childhood, they’re set up for future success, including better confidence, emotional well-being, financial outcomes, and social skills, according to a study published by the American Psychological Association. Even when they made a mistake or slipped up, they were met with grace, honesty, and love, so it’s no surprise that they’re comfortable with discomfort and challenge today.
They didn’t feel the need to hide their struggles out of fear of being punished or to defend themselves against a strict parent. As adults, they feel a similar kind of safety, leading with a desire to learn, rather than a fear of failure or mistakes.
6. They protect their independence
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Confidence in adulthood often stems from healthy parental relationships and childhood experiences. If a child gets consistent love, emotional support, and honesty from their parents, they grow into self-assured adults who mirror similar behaviors and intentions.
It’s the most secure, independent adult children who often grew up with close relationships to their parents, with the space to become their authentic selves and cultivate a strong sense of self-worth that wasn’t reliant on external validation or seeking attention. They’re comfortable in their own company and have a sense of internal motivation that allows them to feel secure, even when they’re not around others.
7. They have high standards for relationships
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According to a study from the Journal of Family Psychology, parent-child relationships and childhood experiences often shape how adult children navigate their romantic connections later in life. If a child has a secure relationship with their family and has great role models of healthy love, they’re more likely to seek partners and cultivate standards that mirror that affection.
Whether it was having parents make space for their emotions or simply offering healthy levels of affection, their relationship standards revolved around the love they were shown as kids. They’re not afraid to wait for the right people, because the self-assuredness they achieved from healthy love ensures they’re comfortable in their own company, even without a partner.
They don’t tolerate toxic people or misbehavior for the sake of validation, because their self-worth comes from inside, rather than external praise, misguided love, and insecurity.
8. They support and help others often
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Empathy often travels through generations, according to a study from the University of Virginia, which is why kids with incredibly close and empathetic parents are often more compassionate into adulthood. From offering small acts of kindness to strangers, being intentional listeners in conversations, and truly showing up for their loved ones, the empathy they lead with in adulthood stems from their parents’ love.
While most people are innately compassionate and loving at their core, empathetic habits and behaviors take a strong role model to learn. If a child grows up with a parent who centers their empathy in every passing interaction and behavior, of course they’ll grow into their own compassionate identity later in life.
9. They follow an intentional routine
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Considering routines are typically associated with better outcomes for kids, including self-esteem, social skills, and general health, adult children who had incredibly healthy, close relationships with parents are better off. They mirrored the patterns and behaviors of their parents and learned to cultivate intentional routines and discipline in their best interest through trust.
While the small rituals and habits they indulge in on the average day might look slightly different from those of their parents, they learned to appreciate the power of routines from growing up in a home where it was second nature. They watched their parents model what self-care, intentionality, and discipline looked like, and soaked it up while growing into their own unique identities.
10. They chase exciting opportunities
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Whether it’s the emotional security great parental bonds spark in children or a predisposition for better life outcomes that kids from good backgrounds have, many people with strong bonds with their parents are set up to chase exciting opportunities and success later in life. They’re not afraid of taking risks and investing in themselves because their parents instilled both emotional intelligence and quiet confidence within them from a young age.
Even if there’s discomfort, challenge, or fear in their path forward, they’ve been equipped with emotional regulation skills and a mindset to protect them in moving forward. They never had to second-guess themselves or worry about taking risks, because they have a strong foundation of love and support to lean on.
11. They put the work into their relationships
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On top of having incredibly high standards for their relationships and seeking out partners who mirror the positive behaviors of their parents, adult children who were extremely close to their parents growing up also know how to put effort into their connections. Their relationships don’t feel like obligations, but they’re not conveniences either.
Whether it’s occasionally inconveniencing themselves to show up for a friend who’s struggling or going out of their way to support a partner who’s having a hard day, they understand that love and affection manifest through small, intentional habits and behaviors, because their parents modeled it for them as kids.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
