If Someone Has These 11 Habits, They Were Likely Raised By Weak Parents
tsyhun | ShutterstockDespite not being comfortable or easy all of the time, setting and maintaining rules, regulations, and boundaries with children at home is key to development and healthy family relationships. However, many "weak" parents, often following permissive parenting styles, focus only on high affection, largely missing out on chances to shape their children with opportunities to practice emotional regulation, self-reliance, and decision-making.
Later in life, these kinds of parenting styles often lead to entitled children who expect people to meet their every need and often rely on external validation for a sense of security. So, if someone has these habits, they were likely raised by weak parents, and it shows in the way they behave.
If someone has these 11 habits, they were likely raised by weak parents
1. They don't take 'no' as an answer
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Oftentimes, the healthiest parenting styles find a balance between permissive parenting traits and over-parenting. They set boundaries and teach their kids to regulate themselves, but they're not stingy with showing affection and love. While over-parenting tends to cultivate entitled children, much like their permissive counterparts, according to a study from the Journal of American College Health, the right balance gives kids a fighting chance to grow into independent, self-reliant adults.
If parents are grasping at feeling secure by controlling their kids' every move, they will grow to expect that from their peers, friends, and partners later in life. They'll feel entitled to people's time and energy because their parents taught them to expect it as a child. They don't have the regulation skills to accept "no" as an answer or a full sentence, because their boredom and discomfort were always swiftly managed by a parent who needed to feel "in control."
2. They equate feedback to personal attacks
If a child grew up appeasing their parents' moods and trying to protect the peace at home, there's a chance they've grown into an insecure identity that needs constant validation and reassurance from others to feel safe. They weren't given the opportunity to practice emotional regulation or self-soothing behaviors on their own, so they need others to step in for them.
That's part of the reason why so many people struggle to accept constructive criticism and feedback from others, whether it's at work or in a personal relationship. These conversations feel hurtful to insecure people, according to a PLOS One study — like a personal attack, rather than an opportunity to learn and grow.
3. They expect praise for the bare minimum
According to licensed clinical social worker Claire Lerner, many kids who grow up to be entitled adults had a lack of limits and expectations from their parents earlier in life. They weren't reminded that they can't have everything they want, and their problems were often met with swift action that protected them from needing to deal with discomfort on their own.
Entitled adult kids now expect praise for doing the bare minimum because their parents allowed them to seek it out. Their emotions were always protected, and their boredom was always taken care of, so of course, as adults, the reality of the world is entirely dysregulating and seemingly cruel.
4. They people-please constantly
While we often think of "weak" parenting styles as permissive — being absent or failing to show up emotionally for kids — it can also linger in parents who seek constant control and authority. If a parent doesn't have their own coping skills and relies on their kids for a sense of security, chances are their kids are going to end up worse off because of it.
According to a study from the University of Cambridge, children who grow up with harsh disciplinary styles from controlling parents are more likely to experience mental health concerns with age. People-pleasing and protecting the peace in their relationships may simply be the misguided coping mechanism for dealing with anxiety or chronic stress that they were forced to embrace as kids.
5. They cancel plans often
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Regulated people, who cultivate healthy, balanced relationships, rarely cancel plans because they "don't want to go." If they make a commitment to someone, they're going to show up, even if it's not always easy or convenient to follow through. They have the self-regulating tools necessary to get out of their comfort zone.
However, children raised by parents who solved all their problems and fixed their boredom didn't give them the chance to cultivate personal responsibility or emotional regulation. They run from boredom and discomfort, especially when nobody else is around to step into the parental role to fix it for them.
That's why if someone often cancels plans, they were likely raised by weak parents. They weren't expected to get out of their comfort zone or do things they didn't want to do, so as adults, they have few coping skills for when they're expected to do hard, uncomfortable things.
6. They confuse boundaries with rejection
When someone sets a boundary with them or brings up a concern in a relationship, people raised by weak parents often equate those experiences with rejection. They grew up getting everything they wanted and living with parents who often tailored to their every need, but now, they're expected to accept and internalize other people's boundaries.
Of course, boundaries aren't meant to police anyone's behaviors or control how they behave — they're simply reminders of the kind of behavior someone's willing to tolerate. So, if someone isn't willing to change, they're not forced to comply — they can simply walk away.
Adult kids with these kinds of parents are allowed to decide they're not going to follow boundaries or grow on a personal level, but that also likely means their relationships will shift and disappear.
7. They refuse to take accountability
If a parent didn't teach a child how to own up to their mistakes without punishing them or solve all their problems for them, chances are they run from accountability today. It feels like a threat to their self-image and personal health, even if it's this discomfort that prompts healthy personal change and empowerment.
Unfortunately for these adult children, according to psychotherapist F. Diane Barth, taking accountability is often an action that allows us to feel better about ourselves. When we dodge taking responsibility and run from accountability with excuses, we sabotage our sense of self-worth and happiness.
So, if someone has these habits, they were likely raised by weak parents and, because of that, they're less happy and fulfilled in their own lives.
8. They run from consequences
Much like boundaries in relationships and constructive feedback at work, people raised by weak parents often struggle to accept consequences for their own actions. They believe that any kind of negative concern or consequences against their behaviors are personal attacks, because they weren't disciplined or held accountable growing up.
Of course, setting expectations and offering consequences for a child's actions is exactly how parents teach their kids to take accountability, according to a study from Paediatrics & Child Health. So, if an adult child is entirely uncomfortable owning up to their mistakes and making changes, that's probably because their parents were permissive or overly forgiving to a fault.
9. They expect emotional labor from others
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Teaching children emotional regulation often stems from independence — giving them the space to fill their own boredom, grapple with consequences, and practice getting out of their comfort zone. As adults, this kind of emotional intelligence plays a role in every aspect of life, affecting not only personal mental health and relationships but also well-being as a whole, according to a 2024 study.
So, if an adult child expects emotional labor from others, like regulating their emotions for them or mediating hard conversations, chances are it's because their parents did those things for them as a kid.
10. They always have an excuse
Many children who rely on excuses to cope are dealing with a fear of rejection or failure. Whether that's rooted in childhood trauma from overbearing parents with impossible standards or permissive ones who always made their kids feel like the center of their universe, making excuses is their way of feeling more comfortable and secure.
Of course, not only do excuses avoid true accountability at the expense of personal relationships and connections, but they also harm personal self-esteem. Even if making an excuse, instead of owning up to a mistake, offers a fleeting sense of stability and comfort, in the end, it's this person's self-worth and self-esteem that are at risk.
11. They blame others for their problems
Entitlement isn't just about expecting constant attention and reassurance from others — it can also be about blaming others for personal faults and expecting the world to put success directly into their laps without any personal effort. These kinds of entitled adults melt down when things don't go their way, because their childhood was crafted around coddling, all-encompassing attention from their parents.
According to a study from Personality and Individual Differences, people with poor emotional regulation skills are more likely to engage in these blame-shifting behaviors. They don't know how to deal with the realization that they're in control — that nobody is coming to save them, including their parents.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
