4 Reasons Smart Women Still Respect The Masculine Vs. Feminine Polarity
NDAB Creativity | Shutterstock It's important to understand feminine and masculine energy and how they interact, even in the age of equality and fluidity. The feminine and masculine in a pure 100% form, where men are "all masculine" and women are the opposite are highly unlikely to exist. After all, gender is a construct, and gender norms are fluid, differing from culture to culture.
The human spectrum of gender is vast, yet the reality of masculine and feminine attributes exists, and they are a mix in all of us. Equality doesn't have much to do with ignoring the differences between masculine and feminine. Equality is about accepting that the masculine and the feminine both have equal validity to determine our life course and how we build community to interact with one another.
Emotional safety can look different from masculine and feminine perspectives when it comes to building love that lasts. Mat Boggs, a relationship expert and author of Cracking the Man Code, joined Andrea Miller on the Getting Open podcast to explain how smart women can benefit from understanding this polarity.
4 reasons smart women still respect the masculine vs. feminine polarity:
1. They know everyone is masculine and feminine
Yes, everyone is a little masculine and a little feminine, and the amount varies over time and in different settings. Our idea of this energy is based on our biochemistry, our sense of self, and our family of origin. These combine to show us how to use different energies to create results.
"Masculine energy is providing, protecting, goal-oriented, and more head-centered energy. Whereas feminine energy, instead of being provider energy, is receptive energy, instead of being a protector, it's a nurturer, instead of being head-centered, it's heart-centered. When we understand those two things, it really helps us in the way we interact."
2. They know that masculine and feminine are not 'strong' and 'weak'
Spending time in the head is more masculine, and spending time in the heart is more feminine; this is "your home base." Andrea says she is "in my feminine state" when she is being in the moment and feeling. Whereas more masculine moments are spent doing and activiity or producing a thing.
Boggs expresses it's super important to dispel the myths that feminine energy is weak, passive, submissive, or any less strong than masculine energy. "They're both incredibly powerful." Blending masculine and feminine gives anyone a lot of strength.
3. They know how to adapt their own energy when appropriate
Boggs claims people are attracted to their polar opposite, so they can get out of balance if they have been focused on enhancing their energy in a way to make it similar to their partner. He uses the example of women at work who are successful by using masculine energy. While this is a great thing for a career, it might not be as suitable for romance if their partner is seeking someone with more feminine energy.
The energies are important because they can tell us how a person drives communication, from the head or the heart. But the most vital aspect is the connection, as Boggs mentions, "The greater point is the connection. The more we're talking, the longer the connection."
4. They know how to get into their energy
Boggs explains, "Intuition is receptivity, gut feeling is receptivity. So the greatest leaders are the ones who have this beautiful blend. They can go back and forth between masculine and feminine. They know what their gut feeling says. They're intuiting the right move to make next because they're able to access both of those energies."
Boggs adds, "The greatest desire of masculine energy is to have his thoughts respected. Why? Because if his thoughts are respected, it shows that he demonstrates that you trust him to be a great provider. The masculine energy wants to deliver happiness to the feminine.
So the masculine says, 'Hey, let's get together on Saturday and go for a hike. I know this great place.' The feminine is the same. You can still be proactive, you can still take initiative, but it's pulling energy versus pursuing energy. So the feminine just flips it the other side of the coin and says, hey, I would really love it if you planned a hike for us this weekend."
We can say nurturing is feminine and providing is masculine, but we can also flip the script and say providing for emotional needs is masculine, and nurturing abundance for the benefit of others is feminine.
Humans share traits, and describing them as either masculine or feminine frames them in the binary so we can compare and contrast. It is part of the dualistic nature argument at the core of our civilization. The binary gives a starting point so we can have a frame of reference to appreciate the vast mixing of masculine and feminine qualities in all of us.
Will Curtis is YourTango's expert editor. Will has over 14 years of experience as an editor covering relationships, spirituality, and human interest topics.
